Have you felt like you’re stuck in your rut lately? 

Do you spend too much time on your own, doing the same things over and over?

Or maybe you feel like you’re holding yourself back?

Chances are, you might just be stuck in a rut!

I love talking about this topic, because over the years, I confess, that I have been the queen of the rut! Getting stuck in a rut can come on you so quickly that you might not even realize that that is your actual problem. Ruts have a way of masquerading as something else. But a rut is simply a rut. Sometimes this tendency is self-imposed and sometimes it can be genetic.

Here are a few more signs that you may be stuck in a rut:

• You’re tired of hearing your complaints.
• You obsess about “getting away”.
• Daily, you don’t look forward to much other than eating, sleeping, and binging that new Netflix series.
• You don’t sense any forward movement in your life, even though you are checking “things” off of your to-do lists.
• You don’t feel “motivated”.
• You know deep inside that you’re tucked away safely in your comfort zone.
• Time seems to be moving fast and slow at the same time.
• Nothing is making your blood boil, absolutely nothing!

If you resonate with a few of the above symptoms, you are probably stuck in a rut. But all hope is not gone. The first step to getting out of your rut is to realize that you’re in one. 

There are a few more things you can do if you’re stuck in a rut: 

1) Get out there, but within your comfort zone

One of the best ways to get out of a rut is by pushing yourself to try new things, however, this can be a bit much for the deeply introverted or the perpetual rut dweller. So think, baby steps! Branch out a little bit and try new things in new places. Or do familiar things in unfamiliar places. Or do unfamiliar things in familiar places. You get the point, right? Sometimes too much novelty, too soon, is too shocking to the system. So go easy on yourself, but do something…new. Then, ahem…celebrate!

Try hanging out with a larger group of people but do so within the confines of your comfort zone, that is, doing an activity that you are familiar with. For example, if you are comfortable at your tiny neighborhood yoga studio, try branching out by taking a class in town at a larger studio, with new people.

Go to your favorite coffee shop and order your favorite drink at their busiest time of day. The key to this exercise is finding a balance; you want to push yourself, but not too far.

2) Meet new people on your terms

Along the same lines, you want to meet new people within your comfort zone too. Spark up a conversation with a friendly person at your favorite store or restaurant. This will help you meet someone that’s most likely like-minded without pushing yourself to the point of discomfort. 

Push yourself to go somewhere where you might meet a new friend with whom you have common interests. This could make it easier for you to mix things up and get out of your rut without pushing yourself to the point of discomfort.

3) Push yourself to participate in something new

Doing something entirely new can be a good way to break yourself out of your rut, but for a lot of introverts and rut dwellers, this can be highly uncomfortable and maybe even anxiety-inducing. You have to push yourself to do something new that you’re comfortable with. 

If you’re more comfortable going out to a game night at a coffee shop or a book club that is a smaller group, push yourself to do that. If you’re more comfortable going to a larger party where you can hide in the crowd if you need to, then that needs to be something new you try. 

You could also, 

• Try a new haircut or color
• Attend a local concert or art show
• Rescue a pet from an animal shelter
• Volunteer at a local charity
• Explore a new neighborhood
• Redecorate a room in your living space
• Buy a new plant

These fixes sound so simple, but they can go a long way in getting up and out of your rut. Try. Something. New.

4) Drive yourself to bust out of your shell

This one is not for the faint at heart. We’re talking plunging in the cold pool or ripping the bandaid off type of stuff here. A really quick and effective way to break out of a rut is by pushing yourself to get out of your shell. You might have developed a shell without even noticing it. This is especially true for extroverted rut dwellers. Ask me, how I know this. Yup, exactly….because this is what happened to me!!!! 

Warning: This exercise might prove to be very uncomfortable for introverts, so it may not be for everyone. But, if like me, you are an extrovert who is in denial, this could help you.

Pushing yourself to try new “spotlight” activities that cause you to push the limits of introversion or extroverted rutism (yes, I made up this word) can help you get out of that rut. 

Try branching out to new small groups where the attention has to be on you at some point, like starting a book club, leading a workshop (my personal favorite), leading a creative writing group, joining a local bridge game, or hosting a small jam session among other things. This will help you break out of your shell and push past this rut you’re in.

The Real Impact Of Being Stuck in a Rut on Mental Health

Getting yourself out of a rut can be quite challenging and the more introverted you are or the deeper your rut, the harder it becomes. The practice of pushing yourself to do new things within the confines of your comfort zone is a real strategy that can work for you. 

Chronic rut dwelling is no laughing matter. As I was researching this subject, I learned that chronic rut dwelling could threaten our mental health, unawares.

According to the Mayo Clinic, chronic rut dwelling (as I like to call it), is closely related to a mental disorder known as, dysthymia (DSM), the mild chronic cousin of depression. So if you or a loved one is suffering from symptoms of chronic rut dwelling, do something about it. 

If you still find this difficult, we recommend discussing it with a licensed therapist. They’ll be able to help guide you to more specific and custom exercises that will better help you get out of this rut without hurting yourself in any way. 

If your quest is living a better life, let’s not overlook these little foxes that can spoil the sweet vine of life.

As always, 

Be well + prosper,

Elaine xx