According to the National Institute of Mental Health, childhood trauma is “The experience of an event by a child that is emotionally painful or distressful, which often results in lasting mental and physical effects.”
Experiencing “g childhood trauma can affect your body, mind, emotions, and spirit in strange ways. It is common for adults to sweep the traumas of their childhood under the rug, thinking that what’s done is what’s. Although true, what has been done to you could affect your adult life unawares. If you or someone close to you has experienced childhood trauma or neglect, it can negatively affect the quality of their adult life in ways you may not have considered. It is a documented fact that mental and physical health may be a stake for survivors of childhood trauma. For instance, childhood trauma survivors may suffer more than others from:
- Anxiety
- Depression
- Worry
- Guilt
- Shame
- Hopelessness
- Poor self-esteem
- PTSD
- Anger and aggression
- Self-destructive behaviors
- Relationship problems
- Sleep difficulties
- Heightened stress response
- Lowered immune response
- A host of adult health concerns
Some of the common causes of childhood trauma are:
- Physical abuse
- Sexual abuse
- Domestic violence
- Dysfunctional family
- Severe accidents
- Death of a loved one or prolonged illness
- Divorce or separation of parents
- Abandonment by a parent or caregiver
- War
- Natural disasters
- Bullying
- Overt long-term discrimination
Kiana’s Story: Lifelong Effects of Being Bullied as a Child
Meet Kiana, a beautiful young girl who was bullied in middle school because she walked with a limp. For years, she endured the jeers and cruelty of her classmates. As she got older, she thought she’d left the Trauma of being bullied behind.
As an adult, she opened her own business, and for some unforeseen reason, she had trouble getting any traction. She’d talk to potential clients, but she couldn’t seem couldn’t the sale. She wanted to appear on podcasts and work as a speaker to bring more exposure to her business, but she kept getting turned down and couldn’t figure out why. Finally, at the suggestion of a close friend Kiana reached out to a business coach, Sheila, who specialized in helping women just like her become more visible. Kiana shared her story and asked for the other woman’s advice.
After listening, Sheila wanted to know if Kiana had ever been bullied or survived a traumatic event. At first, Kiana was confused and unsure of where the coach was going. Sheila explained to Kiana that bullying is considered a childhood trauma that can affect a person for years.
3 Strange Ways How Trauma Can Affect You As an Adult
- Your Body Is Your Home
Your body is your home. It’s the only one you’ve got on earth, and when it’s violated, it can cause mental, emotional, or physical Trauma; trauma essentially vandalizes your home. This can leave you with physical and emotional scars that last for years to come. You may find yourself being overly cautious or standoffish as unfamiliar people approach. You may be uncomfortable in your skin. You may even have trouble bonding with a loved one and showing affection.
2. Your Trauma Keeps You Playing Small
If you’ve experienced Trauma as a child or teen, you may have internalized a fear of being seen. You may not have even realized it then, but some part of your mind decided that if you stayed hidden, the bullies or abusers couldn’t find you. However, this may seem like a valid survival tactic for a young child or teenager with no power over their situation. But it creates a problem as you age and enter the real world. It’s harder for you to grow your business or career because, on some level, you’re still that kid who hopes you’re not seen.
3. Possible Long-term Health Effects: The Trauma Triggers Continue
Your body may continue to send messages that a situation isn’t safe becisn’tit triggers old responses. For example, you might get a terrible stomachache right before a particular event or fight back against a panic attack. These acute symptoms may disappear after the situation you perceived as dangerous is over. Over time, it may take you longer and longer to recover.
You may also experience long-term physical symptoms from the Trauma, such as depression, anxiety, chronic pain, sleep problems, or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Understanding the connection between your Trauma and your desire to be unseen is an essential first step. Now that you know this, you can begin the journey toward healing with the support and compassion you need.
Getting the Help that You Need to Recover from Childhood Trauma:
Be aware that getting the help you need may be extremely difficult. It’s because victims of childhood abuse suffer from avoidance syndrome. In other words, victims will avoid getting the proper help because their brain is trying to protect them from further pain. That’s why they will say something like” “I don’t want to talk about it” or “It’s not a big deal. Or “It happened s” long ago.” Some victims even try to bury those traumatic incidences in their subconscious, so they can’t remember exactly what happened.
How To Be Brave, Put Yourself First and Get the Help that You Deserve
If the Trauma you experienced as a child was prolonged or severe, you might benefit significantly from the help of a licensed practitioner that specializes in mediating childhood trauma. Or, if you see yourself in some of the above scenarios and you feel like you can’t do the growth work that necessitates you to go forth, take life by the horns, or even have the mutually fulfilling adult relationship that you desire, it’s probably a good idea to talk to someone. If that’s the case, be brave, put yourself first, and get the help you deserve.
I hope this little article sheds some light on one of those areas of curating our lives that may not be talked about enough.
As always, my prayer for you is….
Be well + prosper,
Elaine xx